Choosing to Run 100 Miles

tcry

It has been a tough week…

My three year old started back to preschool after a 5 month hiatus, and she has made it a point to express her displeasure with our new daily routine. Every morning this week she embarked on a tirade of crying, moaning, and gnashing of teeth, as she wrapped her little body around my leg and repeatedly questioned, “are you really going to drop me off???”

The stress of her new schedule, in addition to the time change and her overall fatigue, has worn on both of us. I am also battling a kidney stone, which has made me more tired, and just “off”. So, when the weather warmed up this week, I knew I was in for some struggles during my running. I am heart rate training, and I expected that between my fatigue, the pain from my kidney, and the warm weather, I might have some slower paces this week.  I was ill-prepared for just how sluggish I would feel. And by sluggish, I mean I felt like total and utter crud…

So today, when the temps were only 49 degrees, and my kidney was feeling much better, I hoped that my heart rate would behave and I would be able to have an enjoyable run. For some reason, my heart rate strap wouldn’t sync up to my watch…darn. So I just ran. And it was wonderful. So freeing and relaxing. I thought about the women I’m running for, and how they don’t have the option to take an “off” day when they don’t feel well. They don’t have the luxury of ordering out when they don’t feel like cooking, and they certainly don’t have the time for running to relieve stress, etc. This training that I am doing is very mental; I will have to fight with myself and my mind every single day, to stay focused and on track for my goal. The day of my 100 miler, it will be a battle between my mind telling me to stop, and my will pushing me forward. These women don’t have that battle, because they don’t have a choice. They cannot stop the physical suffering from the day-long treks they have to make on a regular basis, carrying a heavy load all the way. They cannot get a “break” from the fatigue they feel under the weight of all of their responsibilities, which will hopefully just meet the basic needs of their families.

My “race” (I am reluctant to even call it that) will be more difficult than anything I have ever done, but I will be doing it of my own free will. Unfortunately, that makes it much easier to give up on and abandon when the going gets tough, but I am trusting in my God to see me through and to realize my goal of running 100 miles for corn. We will raise the money that it will take to provide these women with their corn grinder, and my prayer is that this community will feel the love of God…and that will shake up their whole existence.

 

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